HAPPY NEW YEAR 2017

This year I declined one job opportunity with no regrets.
I had the chance to tell the truths that set me free.
I am just a step closer to graduate.
This year learnt a lot of things.
Let's step into 2017, it will be lovely year.

Couples last week life has knocked me down a few times, it showed me things I never wanted to see. I experienced sadness and failures. It’s unbearable to be weak, and i know things are not going as I planned, or that others can hurt you when you least expected. But one thing for sure, I always get up. 

Forgiveness doesn’t mean that I 'excuse' offensive behavior; forgetting or even trusting the person who harmed me, you will not be welcomed back. 

Connection is love. Validation is fear

Sometimes I share things that I think people will genuinely appreciate, other times I share things because I want people to think that "I’m cool". (There, I said it.) Connection’s my thing; I thrive on it. And getting the seal of approval from someone can make my day. But how much sense does it make to always be seeking love and self-worth from some other place?

The more I think about it, the more I realize that we’re all just looking for love. We want people to see us and tell us we’re OK. We want to be heard, and we want to belong. But my "people-pleasing, validation-seeking" days have brought me to a point where I’m doubting how much satisfaction of 'likes' can keep giving me.

I’m not saying that I’m quitting Instagram or Facebook or another social media platform you name it. But what I am saying is that I need to give myself a little more love and think twice before I share my world with the rest of the world. Why exactly am I snapping a shot of my food/cake/ nor ice-cream before I eat it? Is the ulterior motive to show people that what a great life I'm having, or do I simply want to spread some vanilla-flavoured love? 

Seeking validation is stressful! 

Happiness is a Trap

Society believe that the most important thing about life is to be happy.

I agree.

Then i notice something bias, 

The fact that we think the lottery winner can be much happier, due to our tendency to overrate both intensity and the duration of happiness that we'll experience when we get what we want.

I'm sure you had the experience, let say you got a promotion that you were desperate for or you finally buy a things you really want so badly. And when you finally got it, you spent a few weeks really happy with it, then it was just everyday drudgery, right?

Or there was a product that you needed, wether it was the iPhone, a car, designer makeup, premium shoes, etc. And the first of the couple weeks you want to touch it every single time, post it on social media perhaps, you felt good, it felt good. But after a while, it just started to blend in with the rest of the things in your life. Very common.

The things that we pursue take a lot of time and energy, but the happiness we get out of them is miniscule. This is the trap i try to avoid.

What i can tell you from my perspective is :

1. Stuff

When i was younger i want to wear makeup, then i learn makeup, i started to buy drugstore makeup, when i got the makeup, i wanted more expensive makeup, after that i wanted a designer makeup, and on and on and on. The truth is, the stuff is nice, these things made me happy. But none of them, no matter how much expensive designer makeup i had, hoarding excessive amount of those things, led to any sort of lasting happiness. Having them is nice, but cannot create lasting happiness.

The problem with stuff is that it's very easily corrupted. There's so much advertising on social media, i often will buy stuff to brand my self, to create an image i wanted to show you.

If I buying expensive things, well known brand, for the sole purpose of being perceived in certain ways by my peers, then I am in trouble. Because my happiness is dependent on the opinion of other people. That's lead me to unhappiness.

2. Experience

Nowadays, we want to see the world, we want go to fancy places all blogger and famous people rave about. For the sake of check in on your Path or take a pictures of it so that you can post it on social media as a proof you've been there. The experience is about branding yourself. This is when experience gone wrong.

Experience can be amazing, just like stuff. I love go to fancy cafe, have a cup of tea or coffee with my boyfriend. Talk about the interior, because I'm an interior designer and i have interest for interior in different places. I like go to IKEA, looking for home decoration or to accompany my clients, not for taking a picture on the 'fancy aisle'.

If you are focused on the experience simply for the instagram photo, that's a problem.

Hold on, i'm not trying to be bitter here. It just an explanation that sometimes i felt empty and confused.

I will still buying things, buy makeup buy clothes buy cute stuff buy this buy that, go to fancy places, for my own happiness. Not for how much likes i will get on social media.

Two point above is about the way you orient yourself, where do you place your action.

APPRECIATION

Oftentimes, we're trying to focused on what we don't have, and if you can shift your mindset simply from focusing on what i lack to what i have.

Even in the annoying moment, we're standing in line and it's 30 minutes to get out of the food stores, you can focus on the fact that you think "I'm already 30 minutes late and ain't nobody got time for that" or the fact that "I have food surrounding me from all parts of the world and i live better than Kings did 100 years ago because they couldn't get grapes". Ok that's hillarious. Think that "I'm part of 0.1% lucky people who have ever lived".

I know that there will be things that knock you down, things that suck, and others reason to be unhappy. But there's always a reason to appreciate what we already have.

Hello

Hello.

Ok too much hello.

So I decided to start over from my old beauty blogs.

Blog yang lama isinya cuma beauty related, as i grew up i have enthusiast in so many things. 

I want this blog have everything, not just beauty.

Levande (pronounced lev-un-day) means living, or to live. I enjoy making anything and everything. Whether it be something for myself, or other peoples. I believe there is beauty and satisfaction in making it yourself.  I hope you will join me as I document what I believe I was made to do: make!